🔗 Share this article Navigating the Desire for Casual Encounters While Pursuing a Committed Partnership As a homosexual male in my late 40s, my life has involved numerous, mostly enjoyable years engaging in spontaneous encounters with other men from my teenage years. In my 30s, I was in a serious relationship which continued for a significant period, however it never fully satisfied me, in that I felt neither loved or sexually nourished. The fact is that I have always craved casual sex. Whenever I begin seeing a potential partner, once the newness fades, an impulse arises to be intimate with new partners once more. Reflecting on the Feasibility of Monogamy Currently, I'm contemplating whether it's possible for me to maintain a faithful partnership. I'm aware that many homosexual males have non-monogamous arrangements, but from my observations, they appear demanding, often resulting in significant heartache and envy among all parties. In many ways, I want another man to care for me while letting me pursue other intimacies, but I fear the emotional drain this would cause. Should I just continue to have casual sex and accept that a lasting partnership is not possible? I feel a bit lost. Every person’s sexual journey fluctuates. Avoid considering of your relationship needs or your capacity to tolerate different types of intimate connections as fixed. Your needs as you are experiencing them now may well change in the future; at a certain time you might become more decisive and discover some clarity and a comfortable path … or not. One day you might meet someone who provides a life-changing chance for you through mirroring what you want completely … and later on you may choose that casual connections are best for you. Fretting over what lies ahead and playing endless speculation is merely rooted in fear and squandering of your efforts. Try to be present with your partners, and see the value of every individual you connect with intimately a sexual connection. When and if you are ever ready to strengthen true intimacy with a single person, it will be clear. The psychotherapist is a American therapy professional focusing on addressing intimacy issues.